All Over The Place

Sometimes I think my own biggest personal challenge in Peace Corps is being at peace with my current position.  I think volunteers straight from college have a somewhat easier time, because they haven't quite settled in a life yet, but as a person who quit a job and left a more settled life it's been hard.  During my time in Peace Corps I have missed the weddings of family and friends, the births of babies by some of my closest friends, job transitions, and new house purchases.  I still have yet to meet my nephew who will turn two in July!  As a person who loves to plan it has sometimes been extremely painful to see my friends and family moving forward with their lives while I have felt stuck in my position.  It's challenging because after working quite a few years after college I felt comfortable working towards particular goals; in my job I knew what sales goals I was working toward and positive reviews with the goal of being promoted.  In my personal life, I spent a lot of time building relationships with friends and working on sports training: becoming more flexible in yoga, building muscle and continuing to run races.  My goals in Romania are more obtuse. My Peace Corps program goals are teaching English and sharing American culture, but it sometimes feels hard to understand what I am working towards in a more long term sense.  There are no promotions, 401K plans or pay raises in Peace Corps.  There are no assurances for the future.  After 27 months, I will leave with a small resettlement allowance, one month of free healthcare and my memories.

Sometimes this prospect is incredibly overwhelming as I have no idea what I'll be doing after Peace Corps and after missing so many turning points in the lives of my friends and family it is hard to know exactly how I will fit in.  However, there are moments when I create new memories that help move me forward and realize that throughout the challenges I have had I have also been incredibly fortunate to have some amazing experiences.  Today I was chatting online with one of the daughters of my host mom during my training and she wrote, "credeam ca americanii sunt niste oameni ,,altfel" dar mi-am dat seama ca sunt foarte ok,sentimentali si foarte sociabili!" which roughly translated means, "I thought Americans were different people, but I realized there are very fine, sentimental and very sociable!"  My group of volunteers was the first group of Americans that they had ever interacted with and I can feel proud leaving this little legacy behind me and moving forwards toward the unknown.

Getting There

Last week my tomatoes finally began to ripen and this week I had a tiny harvest on my balcony.  I also finally was able to start teaching in school.  This year I have three 10th grade classes, three 11th grade classes and three 12th grade classes.  All the 10th grade classes and one of the 11th grade classes are new.  It feels funny to finally be starting school in October, but as we say here, "asta e."  The expression ends up translating figuratively to something like, this is life.

Last weekend I went over to Bacau to have a birthday party for a couple of fellow PCVs.  The maxi-taxi ride there takes about an hour and fifteen minutes.  Along the ride I saw lots of fields on fire as people burned up what was left of their corn crops.  We also picked up a lot of people on the road who were coming back from working on their property in the country laden with nuts and produce.  Many people who live in the cities have family property in the country that they work.  As grandparents age in the country, parents from the city move in and inherit the property.  They then give their apartments, which they bought after communism ended, to their children.

As I rode, I thought of how my concept of time in Romania has become so different.  An hour and fifteen minutes each way seems like nothing at all.  I catch up on pod-casts and let my mind wander.  I worry less about those minutes of where I am not productive.  I worry more about my future, about the future of my students, about the economy, about unemployment, and about what I will teach tomorrow.  It seems easier to try to just focus on the scenes in front of me, about the burning fields and people returning from them.

Upcoming Events

Many times in life I am not that good at looking forward, I tend to over-analyze events long after they occur. I try to figure out the perfect thing that I should have done or said.  Sometimes this can help me acquire clarity, but recently it's been weighing me down.  I have been revisiting lackluster lessons and challenging interactions with students, but have been unable to gain addition insight.  This week I have decided to try to make a conscious choice not to focus so much on the past, but to try to look ahead more.  I have two exciting happenings in the near future that I am looking forward to.

The first is that next week is spring break in the Romanian school system and I am headed to Scotland to visit my friends Sarah and Dan and their darling daughter, Hazel.  Sarah and Dan moved to Scotland last summer a few months after I arrived in Romania so it's been fun comparing notes about adjusting to life in a new culture.

with Sarah in 2009

The next event won't take place until the beginning of June, but will be quite the celebration!  This year marks the 20th anniversary for Peace Corps in Romania and the 50th anniversary of Peace Corps globally.  The celebration committee for Peace Corps Romania has elected to mark this occasion by trying to do something different and big!  We are working to raise enough funds to build a house through Habitat for Humanity and also gather together with locals to complete the house. If you already donate to Habitat, please consider allocating your donation to the Beius project, or if you would like to make a one-time donation to the project you can find information about how to do that here.

So in June, I look forward to traveling to Beius to help build a house for a deserving family! If you would like to learn more about the family that will receive the house you can do so here.