When I worked as a barista in college, one of my shift supervisors used to call me Marta Stewart because I had a little too much passion for plating pastries, stocking display shelves, and experimenting with drinks (mind you, this was way before Martha Stewart did jail time). While I always publicly deflected these comments, I also secretly loved them. While I had no desire to run a media empire, I did have a desire to spend my day practicing culinary and creative arts. Today, I still aspire to the idea of being a domestic goddess and love it when care packages include issues of Martha Stewart Living, even if I can't find any of the ingredients to make recipes or do the craft projects.
This coming week I am preparing for the site visit of the Romania Peace Corps Country Director. She visits the site of each volunteer once during their two year service. The visit is informal and can be designed by the volunteer which is lovely, but it got me thinking about what I would actually like to be able to do as a hostess. This is dangerous territory for me because I love to entertain and stateside felt like I could hold my own. In Romania, I feel woefully unequipped.
The first problem comes in my apartment. No matter how much I scrub, I just can't get the floor clean. I believe the flooring is still the communist issue linoleum product that is literally disintegrating, leaving it always vaguely sticky. I have bleached, scrubbed and mopped but to no avail. I just hate that it looks like I am living in filth. There is also issue of the toilet. I won't go into this too much, but each person who needs to use the bathroom in my apartment needs an orientation on how to actually get the toilet to flush.
In my book, part of being a good hostess involves baked goods, but as noted in my previous post, my American recipes don't like my Romanian ingredient substitutes and never quite turn out right. However, on a brighter not I have been able to attain the goal of my previous post by sharing some somewhat imperfect goodies with another PCV, my landlords, and another English teacher. Today, I tested an apple spice cake for the impending visit which was an utter failure and ended up bubbling out of the pan, leaving my poor oven a mess. I still have a couple days until the visit and have one fall back recipe which may work if I can find the necessary ingredients.
I am guess the morale of this blog post is that even 21 months into my service I still feel like I am a beginner in some respects and haven't hit my stride in my Romanian life. I have 6 months left and have come to the realization that I may never feel at home here. I do know that I can survive here which is a great feeling, but I don't think Romania is a place where I can thrive and I am at peace with that.
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